What's Your Role?
I am enjoying reading Donald Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. While I don't necessarily agree always with what he writes, I very much appreciate how he thinks. He examines everything and thinks deeply and honestly.
The book talks alot about story and how life is one big story. I've heard this concept before in some other books (John Eldredge especially), but what I especially liked is a small part about a father creating a role for his daughter in the story of the family. They were having trouble with her and through conversation decided to write a better role for her to fill. Long story short, once she found a role within her family that fit who she wanted to be, she didn't feel like she needed to seek out other stories to be a part of.
In the context of story, I had always thought about my own story. It didn't dawn on me until I read this book, that yes I am a part of a story--but I also need to be writing roles for other people in my life. And allowing them room to write in my story as well. I have written roles for other people, but I didn't realize it. And I now am seeing more clearly that sometimes I have written roles for people that they don't want to fulfill and that's what creates conflict in my story. (i.e. conflict in my relationships!) Sometimes I will have to be firm in those roles--for instance with my children. They may not like the fact that they are my kids--but that is a non-negotiable. But they definitely can have the freedom to grow up and make their own choices of what will interest them, what they will feel passionately about, what they dream--those aren't things that I need to write for them, I need to allow them to discover that. There must be room in my story for their story too....
Love your neighbor as you love yourself....why does this all seem so familiar?? :)